Thursday 3 March 2022

Standing up for what you believe in. Food banks. Animal stories.

 You have to appreciate the MP Zarah Sultana. She’s prepared to stand up and argue for what she believes in and today she has posted this:


“Today the independent regulator said MPs will get a £2,200 pay rise? I believe this is wrong: Ordinary people are facing a cost-of-living crisis. They should get a proper pay rise, not well-paid MPs. That’s why I will donate mine to Coventry Foodbank and other causes.”


A picture might paint a thousand words but sometimes words and promises (so long as they are kept) are better than photo opportunities.


I read that in some places food-banks are also becoming bedding-banks as some families simply don’t have enough duvets and blankets to keep their children warm at night. 


How did we get to this in the 21st century in our country. 


Animals are feeling the squeeze too. At least in this country we only have to worry about urban foxes. Someone I know has deer wandering into her garden. I’ve heard of goats invading village centres during lockdown and I think a few places might suffer from wild boar, but to nothing like the extent that they do in Spain and Italy. But in Northern California and Nevada they suffer from bears breaking into houses in search of food. Around 150 properties have been broken into. One bear even broke into a house while the owners were at home! The bears have learnt to break windows. Experts describe them as “severely food habituated” and say they have “lost all fear of people” and think of them as a food source. Scary stuff - eat your heart out Goldilocks. 


Our eldest granddaughter has a collection of strange and, in my opinion, repulsive pets, some of which need to be fed frozen (and then defrosted) baby rats, or live insects which she orders online and keeps in plastic boxes ready for pet mealtimes. I find it hard to understand the attraction of such pets. Cats and dogs are okay - not that I want one myself but at least I understand what people see in them. Snakes and lizards I don’t really see the point of but there it is. 


So far as I know, she has no stick insects. The only point in having such things must surely be so that you can destress by spending time trying to spot them in their tank or case or wherever they are kept. A sort of living “Where’s Willy?” picture. Anyway, here’s an account I came across of someone having trouble with their stick insects: 


“In simpler times, times when I could safely take change out of my pocket in the Post Office without finding Ethel sandwiched between 2 pound coins (one of our Stick insects, not the wee lady down the street that the storm was chuckin aboot like an empty tracksuit..) I would have laughed at the thought of one of the many, many offspring of Skinny Alan (God rest his soul) following in his footsteps in a bid for freedom.

But alas, the walls of Casa de Twiglet have been compromised and I daren't even open my mouth to laugh in case something fuckin scuttles in. 


We had our Sunday roast on Tuesday this week, mainly because I blinked and Sunday f***ed off. Leaving me bereft and in a state of mourning for most of Monday.

As we sat down to eat it on TUESDAY instead (still feel robbed), the dog glided past on the laminate flooring like a drunken Curling stone, aimed at something I couldn't see.

And there in the middle of the kitchen was a little stick prick looking at us like we'd interrupted a sneeze.


"S**t John... we've been rumbled!" It squealed.  (Yes I know... it's OK. Welcome to my head. Keep your arms and legs inside at all times and try not to fart. There's snacks at the back, if Linda hasn't eaten them all... "PUT IT DOWN LINDA.. YOU'VE ALREADY HAD 3. REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENED AT THE CHRISTENING??!")


"Mummy...?" Said a little voice at the table, the question mark dangling in the air like a cartoon anvil.

"Do stick insects like bananas?"

F*** RIGHT OFF.

There was John. In the fruit bowl, riding a banana like he was on an 18-30's piss up in the sea in the Costa del Sol.


Why are there stick insects in the kitchen???

WHHYYYYY????

Well I'll tell you...

I, in my infinite wisdom (and it IS truly infinite, although it disguises itself pretty well as stupidity) had cleared out the littlest of the bug enclosures at the end of last week. Because of the weather I'd just tipped everything into the bin. In the kitchen. The contents of which contained the rest of the eggs that "hadn't worked" as my oldest claimed. I believed her. 


F***in lies.


SIX I've found under the sink so far.

I think this might be the end...


It's probably fine.”


I’ve had that story sticking around (oops, bad choice of vocabulary!) since before all the Ukraine stuff sprang into the news, so I have no idea who posted it originally.  Ut it made me smile!


Life goes on. Stay safe and well, everyone!

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