Exercise under threat of one kind or another. Words. Small successes.

People in the south of the country were sunbathing in parks yesterday. As a result Matt Hancock is threatening to take away our exercising privileges. Mr Hancock said: "If you don't want us to have to take the step to ban exercise of all forms outside of your own home, then you've got to follow the rules." The health secretary said the vast majority were sticking to the guidelines, adding: "Let's not have a minority spoil it for everybody." Rather like punishing the whole class for the actions of a group of naughty kids. We in the north did not sunbathe!

It must be hard, however, if you have been confined to a small flat to resist the temptation to go out to the park and sunbathe. It is, after all, something of a British obsession. Possibly because we cannot guarantee a sunny summer we have a tendency to rush out when conditions seem right and take off as much clothing as we decently can and stretch ourselves out on the first available bit of grass. It doesn’t really matter that it’s only the beginning of April, when even Mediterranean folk are not rushing to the beach.

And I recognise that I am fortunate enough to live in a place where I can step out of my front door, walk a short distance along the road and be in the middle of a country walk. What’s more, if it comes to an exercise ban, there is always the exercise bike and the rowing machine. Or I could run round the back garden, although whether I could manage to run for thirty minutes round and round and round the garden is debatable. Let’s hope it doesn’t come to that!

One disincentive to heading for seaside places might be the seagulls. The East Riding of Yorkshire council has told residents: “Due to a lack of food sources, seagulls may be more hungry than normal and may behave aggressively.” Usually they scavenge fish and chip leftovers or even mob people eating fish and chips on the seafront but now nobody is out and about doing this and the birds are going hungry. Bridlington council, in line with Mr Hancock, is warning visitors to stay away. “Our message is please don’t go to the coast this weekend.” Local residents can do their daily exercise on the seafront, he added, but if they do, don’t have fish and chips in your hand. Are fish and chip shops still open in Bridlington? There might be a plus-side to this: “Herring gulls are creatures of habit and they pass their local knowledge on to their young. So, if we can adopt this behaviour now, and have a generation of young gulls who haven’t relied on human food, then theoretically it could be possible to break the cycle, and in future people would be more able to eat on the seafront without being mugged. That is a positive to come out of this.”

One of the latest bits of nonsense mythology I’ve heard is that there could be a link between 5G and the coronavirus. Phone masts have been attacked!! Just what we need when so many of us rely on modern technology to keep in touch with friends and family, with our loved ones. Not forgetting how important mobile technology is for the emergency services. The world is crazy!

Some good news: some of the supermarkets are offering their staff - shelf stackers, drivers, cashiers, etc - a bonus to say thank you for keeping us all fed during the crisis.

Now for something not at all crisis-related but connected with my interest in, nay, love of, languages. From the website Babbel, which offers to teach umpteen languages online, I have gleaned some delightful words which are almost certainly untranslatable into English. Here we go:

schnapsidee - a German word for ideas and plans so ludicrous that only a drunk person could have concocted them. 

meriggiare - an Italian word for the very specific act of resting in the shade at noon.

hyggelig - a Danish word for a comfy, cozy, intimate feeling.

gjensynsglede - a Norwegian word for the joy of meeting up with someone you haven’t seen in a long time - this is something we should all look forward to.

gattara - an Italian word for a woman who devotes herself to stray cats - I wonder if the stray cats, like the seagulls, are feeling neglected at the moment.

Yesterday I successfully produced a couple of usable face-makes. Wearable, at any rate. If the rest of the family want me to start a production line for them, I can offer plain white, two shades of blue, striped or flowery, but I will need supplies of elastic!

Also successful was my experimental aubergine dish, perhaps because you could not taste an awful lot of aubergine. Onions, garlic, tomato passata and aubergine slices. I still have half an aubergine and half the packet of passata that went onto the dish. I shall have to repeat the dish, maybe tomorrow before the aubergine is past its best.

Today’s menu is leftovers, mostly the noodles with peppers and tomatoes from Friday. My eldest granddaughter and I have often fantasised about a restaurant called either “Soup and a Sandwich” (an excellent lunch option by the way) or “Gourmet Leftovers”.

And finally, fingers crossed for singer Marianne Faithfull, now in hospital with the virus. It goes on and on!